Unfit Parent: A Disabled Mother Challenges an Inaccessible World: Jessica Slice talks to Jessie Owen

Challenging Perceptions of Disabled Parents

• 💡 The event celebrates Jessica Slice's book "Unfit Parent," which challenges societal views on disabled parenting and inaccessible systems.
• 🎯 Disabled parents are often labeled "unfit," but their experiences offer valuable lessons for all families, promoting acceptance over perfectionism and isolation.

Personal Journeys to Disabled Parenthood

• 🧠 Jessica Slice became disabled at 28, learning to embrace a slower, less controlled life, which positively shaped her parenting approach as a foster parent.
• 🚀 Jesse Owen became quadriplegic at 28, initially doubting her ability to be a mother, but realized parenting is primarily about emotional connection, not just physical tasks, and became a mother to twins.

Children's Understanding of Disability

• 🌱 Young children often don't perceive their parent's disability as "different" or negative, seeing their mom simply as "mom" and learning empathy.
• 💖 Raising children with a disabled parent can foster empathy and a sense of care, teaching them to observe and respond to others' needs without necessarily becoming caregivers.

Division of Labor and Household Management

• 🛠️ Disabled parents and their partners often employ intentional strategies like spreadsheets and "tag-teaming" to divide household and parenting tasks.
• ✅ The goal is fairness, not necessarily equality, with one partner often handling physical tasks and the other managing mental and emotional labor.

Navigating Uncertainty and Health Swings

• ⚠️ Living with disability means constant uncertainty about health and physical capacity, which translates into parenting with an adaptive mindset.
• 🤝 Building a strong community is crucial for disabled parents, acting as a support system and a hedge against life's unpredictable challenges.

Addressing Internalized Ableism and Public Judgment

• 💬 Disabled parents often battle internalized ableism and the pressure to "overperform" to avoid external judgment.
• 💡 It's important to discern between constructive feedback and mere "noise" or projection from others, focusing on being present and grounded rather than chasing validation.