Stop Fetishizing Subconscious Thoughts: Why Chosen Thoughts Are More 'You'

The Pitfall of Original Thoughts

• 💡 Many people new to thought work worry about gaslighting themselves by changing their thoughts.
• 🧠 This concern stems from an assumption that original, unconscious thoughts hold more importance or truth simply because they arise spontaneously.
• ⚠️ The premise is that thoughts your brain spits out unintentionally are more real or valuable than those you intentionally cultivate.

Understanding the Bias for 'Yours'

• 🧩 Humans have a psychological bias to value things more when they belong to us, a phenomenon seen in experiments with objects.
• 💸 This bias extends to thoughts, where we overvalue our own spontaneous ideas simply because we had them first.
• 🚀 This is not the only reason we cling to original thoughts; fear of being wrong and the desire to perceive reality objectively also play roles.

The Source of Our Thoughts

• 🧬 Unconscious thoughts are shaped by genetics, socialization, upbringing, media, trauma, diet, and random neural firings—factors we don't choose.
• 🧠 Conscious thoughts, chosen on purpose, originate from the prefrontal cortex, the most evolved and rational part of the brain.
• 🎯 Choosing new thoughts intentionally is not lying to yourself; it's using the most rational part of your brain to direct your thinking.

Defining Your 'True Self'

• ✨ The most real or 'you' thoughts are the ones you choose intentionally based on your goals, values, and chosen beliefs.
• 🚗 Fetishizing subconscious 'burps' is like letting a car drive itself without taking control of the wheel.
• ⚖️ We get to decide what we believe are our most real or true thoughts; intentional choices are more aligned with our conscious identity.

Motivation Matters in Thought Work

• ✅ Feeling like you're gaslighting yourself often stems from the motivation behind changing a thought, not the act itself.
• 🚩 If you change thoughts about a partner out of scarcity (believing you can't do better), it feels like gaslighting because the motivation is flawed.
• 🛠️ Using thought work to align with your values and priorities is not gaslighting; it's a tool for intentional self-direction.