Nicola Sturgeon Reflects on Her Time as First Minister, Alex Salmond, and Personal Life

Reflections on Writing Her Autobiography

• ✍️ Nicola Sturgeon found writing her autobiography, 'Frankly', to be a special and enjoyable process overall, particularly the editing phase.
• 💡 She learned things about herself while writing, aiming for openness and candor about mistakes and challenges.
• 📚 While she enjoys fiction, she is unsure if she has the skill to write a novel, viewing it as a distinct art form.

Political Decisions and Misjudgments

• 🎯 Sturgeon acknowledges misjudging the mood of the Scottish people post-Brexit regarding independence and the handling of gender self-ID legislation.
• ⚠️ While she stands by the fundamental decisions, she reflects that the timing of a referendum bid after Brexit was wrong, partly due to Theresa May's snap election.
• ⚖️ Regarding gender recognition, she believes she might have paused the legislation when it became controversial and should have engaged more with concerns to allay them.

Personal Toll and Coping Mechanisms

• 😥 Sturgeon describes her appearance at the COVID inquiry as a raw, emotional moment where she feared she wouldn't stop crying, stemming from the cumulative stress of her time in office.
• 🧠 She sought counseling for the first time in her life to regain equilibrium and perspective after feeling close to the edge.
• 🥣 During the height of the pandemic, she struggled with eating, relying on homemade soup from a friend's partner to ensure she consumed meals.

Relationship with Alex Salmond

• 💔 Sturgeon describes a grieving process following the breakdown of her relationship with Alex Salmond, a central figure in her life and career.
• 😔 She found it hard to reconcile past successes and happy moments with him, as they felt tainted by subsequent events.
• 🗣️ She notes that while Salmond could articulate a strong vision and engage with details he was interested in, he sometimes left heavy lifting to others, including herself, and didn't engage fully with the referendum campaign until late.

Public Scrutiny and Personal Boundaries

• 🎤 Sturgeon discusses the intense public scrutiny, including rumors about her sexuality and a surreal voice training session with Sean Connery.
• 💬 She addresses the controversy with J.K. Rowling, suggesting that while disagreement is fine, the language used escalated personal attacks and vitriol.
• 🚺 She candidly discusses experiencing menopause while running a country, aiming to show it's possible to manage big jobs while being conscious of its effects.
• 😔 She also reflects movingly on a miscarriage and her conflicted emotions at the time, questioning if her ambivalence about wanting a child contributed to her feelings of guilt.
• 🚫 She addresses a past instance of sexual bullying, which she only recognized as such years later, and discusses the difficulty of naming the perpetrator.
• 🏳️ Regarding her sexuality, she states she does not consider it binary, emphasizing her personal view without seeking to label herself, and aims to redraw boundaries between her public and private life.

The Future of Leadership and Politics

• 🌍 Sturgeon worries that the current state of democracy and discourse may deter good people from entering politics, leaving the field open to those who thrive on negativity.
• ⏳ She notes the increased pressure on leaders due to the speed of news cycles and the inability to draw lines between personal and professional life.
• 🤔 While she doesn't see herself fighting another election, she remains passionate about the world and democracy, and is still figuring out how she will express these views and influence things in the future.
• ✈️ She contemplates living abroad for a period to gain perspective and escape the intense scrutiny in Scotland, considering London as a possibility.