Loretta Ross on 'Calling In' vs. 'Calling Out' Disagreements

Shifting from 'Calling Out' to 'Calling In'

• 💡 For over 50 years, activist Loretta Ross battled racism, sexism, and sexual violence, but at 71, she advocates for a more effective approach to disagreements.
• 🎯 Ross contrasts 'calling out', which publicly blames and shames, with 'calling in', a method to achieve accountability without anger.
• 🔑 Her new book, 'Calling In: How to Start Making Change with Those You Would Rather Cancel,' explores this shift.

Personal Transformation and Advocacy

• 🚀 Ross shares her journey of overcoming childhood trauma, deciding that her experiences would not define her future.
• 💬 A pivotal moment occurred when a man in prison, William Fuller, wrote to her expressing a desire to stop raping, which challenged her initial impulse to 'call him out'.
• 🧠 This experience led her to understand that victims can sometimes become violators, prompting a deeper reflection on patterns of behavior.

Addressing Unhealed Trauma and Polarization

• ⚠️ Ross suggests that much of 'callout culture' stems from unhealed trauma, leading people to hurt others to prove their own hurt.
• 🏠 She advises against escalating family disagreements, encouraging people to handle passion with compassion.
• 💬 The phrase 'tell me more' is highlighted as a powerful tool to foster inquiry and open conversations, even with those holding different views.

Opinions as Identity and Political Divides

• 📌 Ross observes that in current times, opinions have become identities, leading to unnecessary enmities with those who don't perfectly align.
• ⚖️ She differentiates between the left and right regarding power: while the left can be intolerant, it tends not to weaponize law and police against dissenters as much as the right might.
• ✅ Ross believes that most people are capable of compassion and can be encouraged to expand their circle of kindness, finding shared needs and values even amidst differing solutions.