How Women Can Negotiate Successfully: The Relational Ask Formula

The Negotiation Gap for Women

• 🎯 Women negotiate just as frequently as men but are less likely to be successful and face a higher risk of backlash.
• 💡 This disparity leads to missed opportunities, lower earnings, and negative impacts on mental well-being.
• ⚠️ Traditional negotiation advice, often based on male norms, can be counterproductive for women.

The Relational Ask Strategy

• 🔑 A research-backed approach called the relational ask is presented as a more authentic and effective strategy for women.
• 🧠 Studies indicate that using a relational ask significantly increases success rates and strengthens relationships, while virtually eliminating backlash.

The Successful Negotiation Formula

• 📝 A formula for crafting a successful ask is introduced: past performance + future vision + the ask + a collaborative question.
• ✅ Past performance highlights what has already been achieved.
• 🚀 Future vision outlines a shared goal that benefits everyone involved.
• ❓ The collaborative question helps overcome self-negotiation and avoids making others uncomfortable.

Applying the Formula

• 💡 Example 1: Instead of "I deserve a promotion," use "As you know, I exceeded my sales targets by 10 percent last year. I think I can do it again this year, but in order to do that, I need the credibility that comes with a director title. What do you think?"
• ⏰ Example 2: Instead of "I want to work less," use "As you know, I piloted a new onboarding process this quarter and it's getting great results. We can roll it out across the company next year, but in order to do that, I need to work the hours when I'm most productive, which is typically earlier in the day. How can we make this work?"

Moving Forward

• ⏳ While gender parity is still a long way off (estimated 191 years), 79 million women need tools to succeed now.
• 💬 The speaker encourages sharing this formula with other women to equip them with the necessary tools to negotiate for a life they love.