Achieving Impossible Goals: A Perfectionist's Guide

Understanding Perfectionism

• 💡 Perfectionism is defined not as being perfect, but as the belief that one should be perfect and is never good enough.
• 🧠 Most listeners and students are identified as perfectionists, often struggling with the idea that they haven't done a job well enough.
• ⚠️ Perfectionists can misuse tools like setting 'impossible goals' by absorbing them into existing fantasies, leading to self-beatings.

The Pitfall of Perfectionist Fantasies

• 🎯 An impossible goal is a big goal one believes they cannot accomplish.
• 🚫 For perfectionists, the pitfall is turning a long-held perfectionist fantasy into an impossible goal without changing underlying thought patterns.
• 🔄 This often results in the same cycle of not achieving the goal and feeling bad about oneself, just with a new label.

Setting Serviceable Impossible Goals

• 🔑 To set a goal that serves you, understand why you want the goal and why you think it's impossible.
• 🚫 If either answer relates to self-worth or lovability, it's likely a perfectionist fantasy, not a serviceable impossible goal.
• ✨ A serviceable impossible goal should not be tied to proving your worth or finally feeling good enough.

The True Purpose of Impossible Goals

• 🚀 The reason to set an impossible goal is to blow your own mind with what you can accomplish and who you can become.
• 🌟 It's about expanding your vision of what's possible, not about obtaining an outcome or creating a new circumstance.
• 🧠 Most people underestimate their capabilities due to absorbed socialization and limiting beliefs about their potential.

Examples and Considerations

• 💰 The speaker shares her own experience setting impossible financial goals in her business, which seemed impossible due to her belief about being bad with money, not her self-worth.
• 🎭 The journey of pursuing an impossible goal is more important than achieving it; it's about the transformation and who you become.
• ⚠️ Goals tied to worthiness, proving oneself, or creating happiness through external circumstances are doomed to fail because the process involves discomfort and failure.
• 💡 A goal like napping every day for a year can be an impossible goal for someone who struggles to rest, emphasizing that the goal itself is less important than the personal growth it inspires.